Steering

At the wheel? I've been hunting for that wheel for months now. Someone else is steering this baby and I am losing stuff, watching the clutter and the pounds piling up, forgetting to call people, crying during both receptions I missed...
I have taken control of one aspect of my life for the past two weeks--WHAT I EAT. Dad made a small goal a couple of months ago to not eat after 6:00pm (or after dinner) which he has now abandoned for better choices. Within about five days, he started to ask me how many points for this or that. I handed him a journal and he is now an amazing 10+ pounds down!! Now, mind you everyone, because he is taller and a male, he gets to eat nine more points a day. Well I showed him how I felt about that--I didn't control my eating. Eventually, with gentle encouragement and a fantastic example in front of me, I am now in control. I have seen a little difference weight wise, but mostly just the confidence and energy. There is something magic about writing down what I eat. I can't explain it.
I can't control the tears when the car drives away with my children inside, heading off to home or college. I can't control the worry when my surfer dude does not call me two hours after leaving to tell me another dip found him safe again. I can't control the passing of time and rising of elevation in the children. I can't control the longing to spend lots of time with those sweet granddaughters. I can't control broken-down cars and busted ovens. And I can't control the headaches on Fast Sunday. But I CAN control what goes in my mouth, and I CAN write it down. This one change will be my blessing. I owe it to myself. I owe it to all of you. I owe it to this great country where I CAN control this!!!